ok...if we were gonna take on simon cowell i figured niki n me kneaded sum a backup. a henchman! w/ 3 of us we cud totally be like a charlies angel team!
niki wuz off doin sumthing else prolly murder (oh how i luv that about her. id want to haf her babies if i didnt like boyz so much) so it wuz all up 2 me! unfortunately it looked like i wud like haf 2 haf a stupid henchman. no not bcuz i wuz following stereotypes but bcuz wenever a smart 1 cam in i cudnt let there succulent brainz go 2 waste! i ate brainz of a sniper, black belt in martial arts, n a mad scientist b4 i made ne progress lol!
newayz ill get into the 1s who survived! i had them send in photo resumes b4 they got hear bcuz i prep stuff good like that! so the 1st person wuz a hick named Jimbo.
me!: hi! how wud u be useful as my henchman?
Jimbo: Henchman? What do that there word mean? I ain't doin' no henchin'!
me!: uh ok lol. do u kill peeps?
Jimbo: I reckon I would. Especially if there be some racial profilin' involved.
me!: we knead 2 kill simon cowell from amerikan idle!
Jimbo: Simon Cowell? American Idol? I ain't gots the TV.
so that 1 didnt go 2 well! the next lady wuz named francine. i think...she wuz a forum noob! oh no!
me!: omg hi! how wud...
Francine: Oh my gosh! You know what I think? I think you are Peter Petrelli!
Francine: You know how Niki has that split personality? Maybe you killed her in the future as Peter, took her power, and became Sylar. It makes sense!!!
me!: but niki is my friend!!!
Francine: You know what else? I bet you get the power of shapeshifting and turn into Sean Bean!
me!: sean bean?? ewwwww
Francine: I wonder what "Save the Cheerleader, Save the World" really means....
there wuz 1 more! he wuz sum jahovas witness lol the bottom of the barrel!
Jeremiah: Hello there! My name is Jeremiah Bartholomeau Christ the XVII! How are you today?
me!: uh fine thanx 4 asking! wut makes u want 2 b my henchman?
Jeremiah: Henchman? Oh no, I think you are mistaken. I have no desire for henching. I have come here to spread the word of the Lord.
me!: omg not interested! kin u kill peeps??
Jeremiah: Are there religious ramifications involved?
Jeremiah: Is the perpetrator, say, Muslim?
me!: um...he CAN be!
Jeremiah: Then I suppose I may be able to help. If you decide to join my path, and help me spread the word of God, that is.
me!: uh i dont no ill haf 2 think about that 1! thank u! we haf ur number!
so there u haf it! the audition wuz ovr. i had 3 contestants n i wuznt sure wich 1 2 go with! wut do u guys think? i guess ill decide tom! toodles!