Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Burnt Toast!

Hey guyz! You can find me on Burnt Toast Diner this week! Hopefully I can get a post up on my personal blog this week if I have time, too! Until next time! Toodles!

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

A Sylarz Song

Hey guys! Still on the road and super bored, so I thought I'd write a lil song! We already know I'm awesome at it from Hank's rap, so let's try again! Here we go!

(Chorus)
Sylarz, Sylarz, he's so hot, he's so great!
You want a date?
Maybe if you are a hot boy
You can be Sylar's sexy new toy

Powerless, and friendless, yet still lookin' for guys!
Gonna buy all the jewelry, money can buy!
For myself, looking great, in my right ear!
Now isn't there something about me, you think quite queer?

Well, it's that my powers are gone, that's right, of course!
I hope you weren't thinkin' about something perverted or worse
Cause I'm as pure as snow, and perform no sin
I'm speaking of course of man love, but murder is in

(Chorus)

Alejandro, Alejandro, what'll I do with you?
I'm not sure if I'll molest you, or turn your brain to stew
But I think I have an idea, that you'll see with your eye
I'm probably gonna hit on you and then perform homicide

Now Maya, Maya, if I didn't like boys, you'd be hot
But that is not the case so unfortunately you're not
So I see you as expendable and hopefully soon
I'll tear your brain out, take your power, all by noon

(Chorus)

I'm so sexy, hooooot, in more ways that one.
All you sexy boys are lookin' to get some.
But the one I'm really lookin' for has got to be Peter.
And when I find him and accost him it's gonna be sweeter.

Syter 4eva!

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Friends?

Lol, well, my friendship with smoke monster didn't really end up like I'd hope. Instead I ended up shrieking like a little Sylar for most of the time I spent with it. Making out with smoke makes it like, kinda hard to breathe 'n junk! Who would have thought?!

Well, anyways, somehow I like, mysteriously escaped. I'm guessing it was through the power of the smoke monster. I bet she gets tired of guys quickly. I was used 'n teleported away to stinky desert!

Well, after almost getting hit by a sweet Nissan Rogue, the bestest cars in the world (I own 4, as does every member of the Sylarkin family even though I've killed most of them lol), it like instead stopped and picked me up! Friends? Could be!

I found myself in a car with a gross white boy, an annoying latina, 'n a hot latin boy! I tried to make my move on the hottie, but it seemed he didn't understand English. God, stupidity like, totally turns me off, 'n junk. Especially when it comes in the form of a Mexican from the continent of Asia lol!

So, I gave up on the stupid latin boy and instead tried to make friends with the peeps closer to my elevated intelligence level lol. I talked to the white boy, but all he talked about was "Waaah, waah, they're murderers!" He like, was racist against murderers! I, like, am a murderer 'n stuff! So I killed him dead for his racism lol.

So then I tried to talk to the Latina girl. She was pretty, but not as hot as Sylarz, lol.

"Hi, my name is Sy...briel Gray."

The girlie burst into tears. "Hi Sybriel. Nice to meet you."

I was confused by her silly crying. I mean, as a Sylar, I'm used to crying. But this crying was silly!

"So, do you like, have any hobbies, 'n junk?" I asked sexfully.

She cried harder, "I love dancing, and donkey riding, and crying."

I turned to the sexy, stupid latin boy. "PMS?" I axed. He looked at me like a big, dumb stupid guy who can't like hear Braille lol. I totally forgot he was stupid 'n stuff!

I turned back to the crier. She was eating an ice cream sandwich, and crying. "Oh, I love ice cream sandwiches," she whined, in between tears. "They're my favorite."

I picked up my bloody brick to crush her annoying crying skull, but then, stupid sexy latin boy grabbed my arm 'n started shouting.

"Blah blah! Bloo blah blee blah!" He screamed like a prehistoric Lutheran lol. But I looked into his sexy eyes and they calmed me, even though he was stupid and his sister cried more than a Sylar, I started sucking my thumb and fell asleep in a sexy fetal position.

I don't think this characters will make good friends :( In fact, I'll probably kill them when I get my powers back, lol. The search continues!

Monday, October 15, 2007

An Evening With Smoke Monster, Part 2!

So like, what pair of hoey friends are like the hottest in the whole wide worlds?! Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie. Mary Kate and Ashley Olson. Sexy Sylarz and Smoke Monster lol. Oh I got that sexy monster all hoed up, with some sexy rouge, some blush to bring out its smoke bones, and some hot black lipstick to compliment Smokester's hot black smoke.

So we like, started wandering in the woods like a couple of hot wood elves lol, until we ran into John Locke! He was like, kinda icky. I didn't really see what smokester saw in him. He was old! And bald! Ewwww!

Anyways, ugly Locke saw us and stood up, looking with intrigue at Smokester!

"John," said Smokester.

"You again?" ugly Locke said!

"John, I want you to be with me."

"Haven't we already talked about this? I can't be with you anymore. I just can't."

Smokey started to cry big billowing smokeful tears! "But John, I love you!"

Ugly Locke looked annoyed. "Well I don't love you! I love Jacob! We're together and happy!"

"NOOooOOOooOOcoOOOooOooOO!" Smoke Monster let out a bloodcurdling shriek!

"I...I've gotta go. I've got a date with Jacob. I can't be late."

Ugly Locke pranced off, and all was left was me 'n Smokester, with her cryin' like a lil Sylar lol. But just then, some peeps passed through the forest near us, and one was like totally led by a hot boy! Not only that, but they shouted that they could totally get off the island now!

"Like, freedom, lol!" I giggled, and ran off toward them!

But before I reached the hotness of hot boy, I felt a tug on my dainty leg. I looked down 'n saw the gentle touch of Smokester's smoke on my leg. All of a sudden it dragged me down and started pulling me, OMG! Smokester dragged me down into a hole in the ground! It must be her love nest! She'd taken a desperate turn and settled for a sexy Sylar as a rebound!

"But I don't like girls!" I shrieked as I descended into the darkness of Smokester's love pit!

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

An Evening With Smoke Monster, Part 1

OMG! So yeah I'm still like, totally powerless, 'n like, SUPER bored without any brains to eat or boys to look at! So, you know, I kinda took a walk in the woods for some reason! This place totally seemed familiar, a LOST kind of place, kinda like a place where a plane would crash, with Matt the fat mind reader boy being the pilot! Silly Matt! Marriage, flying planes, trying to shoot Sylars, he just can't do anything right lol!

Anyways I was kinda walking around, pouting and throwin' a hissy fit, when all of a sudden, I heard this sound that hella heard like a mix of a constipated cow tryin' to let loose and a Sylar mating call lol. I turned and OMG guys, you won't believe what I saw!



It was totally, like, a billowing billow of billowy smoke! And it had a bow or something on!

"OMG I totally love your bow, it's like, so cute!" I shrieked in cute joy at the thing!

The smokey thing stared at me for a moment, sucked it's bow into it's smokey smoke body like a thingie that sucks things to hide it, and then to my surprise it talked or something!

"That wasn't a bow! I don't wear cute things! I'm a vicious killing machine!" it said in a totally deep voice.

"Awww, you do wear cute things! And I'm a killer too lol! So don't even try it! So, who have you killed?"

"Mr. Eko."

"Well, why did you do that, silly billy? To be special?" I sexfully asked.

"Well, you see, I asked him out on a date, and he told me he wasn't gay. Why do people assume that ominous clouds of smoke are male?!" the girl smoke whined.

"Oh, so you're a girlie? Lucky!"

"No! I'm nothing! Do you see any genitals?" The smoke swung its smokey groin at me.

"No fun spots?! Then what's the point of finding a man?!"

"Can't a creature find something more than lust in a man? Can't one find...love?"

I stared at him/her smoke thingie stupidly. Smoke thingie waited for my answer but then smartly realized that I was too stupid and wasn't going to answer lol. Well, anyways, the sexy smoke thingie continued!

"Anyways, I haven't had much luck! I almost had Locke down in my sexy love pit, but stupid Jack pulled him away. God, is he annoying. And then Mr. Eko, turning me down, thinking me gay, he had to die!"

"Well I tell you what, how about I totally help you go find a sexy guy?"

The smoke thingie like, sniffed, and looked at me with its puppy smokey non-existent eyes. "Can we kill Jack, too?"

"Of course! I wouldn't have it any other way, silly!"


To be continued or some junk, lol!

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

OMG, A Powerless Sylarkins!

My specialness, NOOooOOocoOOooOOoOoOO! It's like, totally gone! Waaaa! Waaaa! All my adventures in the sewers and my silly Dr. Phil murdering escapades were all like a...um...a...dream! Yeah, that's it! They were a dream! That silly fat lady Candice/Michelle/Ambiguous Fat Girl like totally made them my fantasy! She knew me like, so well!

Unforunately for Candice/Michelle/Ambiguous Fat Girl (I like, totally don't read the graphic novels. Those are so nerdy lol), I didn't know that I didn't have my super specialness! So I killed her to try to get more super specialness! But I didn't get any super specialness! Instead, I just got a case of the runs worse than I got from tacos and Future Sylar brains! I like, totally let loose in that sexy barrel outside my lil hut! That was a cute lil hut, wasn't it? I bet I could decorate it to make it so cute! With intestine streamers and brain lamps and all other sorts of cutesy wootsy decor OMG it'd be so hot!

Wait a minute, I forgot, I'm not special anymore! Waaaa! It's like high school all over again! I'm gonna get made fun of for dressing like a girl! And if I had Candice/Michelle/Ambiguous Fat Girl's brain, I could totally like, beCOME a girl 'n some junk! But now, what's the point of killing peeps when you don't even get specialness from it? 'N I ate fat girl brain! I used a straw to suck it out through a lil hole in her fat skull like a fattening fatty chocolate milk shake! Ugh! My thighs are gonna be feeling this one! And I'm not even SPECIAL! Waaaa!

Well, I think I'm going to go into my cute little hut and cry some more. Maybe then I'll have some adventures on the LOST island or whatever the heck this place is that I'm like, totally trapped on. I'll tty guys lata. Rescue me!

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

A Sylarz Vacation :(

Hey guyz! I am going on a lil trip. I know, I know, I just started blogging again. But like, don't worry! I'll be back next week, on Tuesday!

In the mean time, you can totally read about my dancing fantasy with Mr. Glasses at the Burnt Toast Diner. Here's a lil taste of it!



Until next week then! TTYL!