Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Yo dawgs!

Yo, yo, yo my homies! Shout outs to the big man, MR. GL --- BENNET! I'se kinda forgot you read this blog son, so I thought I'd post a message on here. So this be Sylar posing as Hank, yo...wait no, I mean Hank posing as Sylar! Hank posing as Sylar!

You shouldn't pay attention to Sylar's last post, or his post on the Burnt Toast Diner. He made those posts before he died and he was on all SORTS of crazy drugs at that time, man. He stole my pic from the Christmas party and posted it on his blog lol...I mean, son.

And if you think that whack cat could take out ol' Hank, you are sorely mistaken! Not with my arsenal of street skills that I learned straight from the street, yo! I bust caps in all sorts of azzizles. What's Sylar gonna to do? Force push me to death? That ain't how it works in the streets, yo. And that's how we roll, son!

But we didn't have to fight it out, street style, cause Sylar just, like, dropped dead, man! I had to cover him in a sheet, because he was looking too fly and if I didn't cover up his hotness I might have lost control. But now its all good, yo!

To my homes Bennet, I'll keep a log up on Sylar's blog til you're ready to examine his hot body, yo. Hopefully, you can come check on him soon, his makeup is smudging. But if not its all good, dawg. You're the boss! I'll be around when you get here. Hehehe.

With much love to my homies,

P.S. This is not a trap.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

lol @ self referential humor!

so if u read my post at the burnt toast diner u kno that i killed sum dude (and no i didnt eat his brainz, i do have SUM self control lol) and am halfway on my way to xcape! but i have to wait for mr glasses to get back so i can enact my vicious revenge upon him! so i like have sum time to kill.

so i have a confession to make. all this time in this cell, in between the druggings and tests ive been on the net alot. and on here ive been thinkin about boyz i think r hot. well i have kinda a big crush on this guy.

omg, milo ur like sooooooo hot! i totally want to have his babies! too bad i have no ovaries or womb lol. but seriously ive totally been in luv with him since gilmore girls!

but the funny thing is that i ran into a guy who kinda looked like milo a lil while ago! it almost stopped me from trying to hurt him he looked so close to him! but i still threw lockers at him with my mind trick and fell off a ledge with him. we were lying on top of each other and it was almost like i was with milo! he smelled so good! if he didnt have those crispy bangs i woulda jumped his bones!

but i wuz able to control myself. i guess im not in such a lustful mood when trying to kill peeps lol. but hopefully ill get to run into him again in a less stressful situation! becuz i think it may have been milo, and if it is, then thats one person with a power whose brain i couldnt eat!

i know, like omg you never thought i would say that right? well even i make sum xceptions! like dr hank. i didnt eat his brian. but thats mostly becuz he smells. but newayz im gon do some more net surfing while waiting for mr glasses. maybe find a few more milo pics. hes so dreamy!

Saturday, January 27, 2007


im bored! i cant take this stupid place anymore! mr glasses is turning down my advances, but the haitian is encouraging them! aaarch! ive had enough, i had to get out of here.

so i put devious xcape plan #2 in motion (the first 1 being pulling eden through my window. lol that wuz fun). newayz ive come to except that i cant use my powers in this lil room. so id have to use my real life fighting skillz!

first of all i banged my head on my hard table a few times. it kinda hurt lol but i totally needed to fool them guys! so i laid there with my eyes closed (no one kin resist that!) and some blood everywhere til one of those primatech paper lackeys came by. he saw me in my own blood and called someone on his radio. he opened the door and i jumped up, READY TO POUNCE!!!

so i set to attacking him. i slapped, and clawed and bit. i even broke a nail omg! the guy stood there all confused. after letting me slap him around a lil, he pulled off the jumpsuit he was wearing to reveal this:

he wuz a f-in ninja! my sissy strikes culd do him no damage. right away he shuto'ed me in the throat!


newayz i culdn't breath and fell down. i wuz foiled again lol! looks like ill just have to plan my next devious xcape better, now that i no primatech is guarded by sick ninjas! but that may have just been becuz of the new drugs i'm on lol.

newayz back to myspacin and bloggin til my next xcape attempt. hopefully soon! im hungry fer brainz. toodles!

- Sylarz

Friday, January 26, 2007


lawlers. i just read my last post and boy how silly is that! those meanies really screwed with my mind thank goodness i'm back to my normal hott self. i'm not sad. im happy and full of life! well if one thing good came out of that post its those hot dancers! i wunder where i found that pic. oh well its something nice to look at at least lol.

neways, so mr glasses was moving me to a diff location in his nice building to do some diff tests when we ran across a tour group. i don't think mr glasses wanted them to see me, cuz he pulled me away from them real quick, but i wuz able to yell out "give me your supple nutritious brainz little boy!" to some kid. lol. sometimes i dont think before i talk when brainz come into the equation.

newayz we went back and got the tests done and they took me back to my cell. so i wuz perusing the net and myspace and junk when mr glasses came down to play some more mind games with me. no not the bf/gf kind, but the psychomological kind. he showed me the pic of the little boy i yelled at drew and asked wut i thought of it. here it is:

needless to say i thought it wuz great! sure he didnt quite show the detail of my eyez (prolly my best quality, all the guyz say so) but it wuz pretty cool! im glad i made such an influence on the boy. wut do u think?

- Sylarz

Wednesday, January 24, 2007


Two days. That's how long I had been lying on that table in my cell thanks to the drugs they'd given me. My reaction to them is surprising. It seems my mind has been divided into two sections. Internally, I'm thinking clearer than I ever have. I feel sane, a feeling I cannot remember feeling...for a long time. It feels wonderful to be able to process thoughts intelligently, but of course, the pros always have to be taken with the cons.

Externally, my insanity has taken the form of horrifying hallucinations. I have been so paralyzed by the terror of them that I haven't moved an inch. Only today did I get the courage to crawl over to my laptop and record my thoughts, for I am afraid I will either eventually return to my old self, or die from the terror of these things I am seeing.

Looking over some of my blog posts, I can not believe some of the things I've done...murder...cannibalism...cross-dressing. I can't even believe the way I talk!
This is not who I am!

Maybe I should give you some examples of the depth of insanity of "Sylar..." of me...These images are representations of the things that I have been seeing with my waking eyes. These are normally things that go on inside my head; they are part of my psych, the things that make me....tick. Take a look, and try not to vomit. the world I live in now. I do not see the small cell I have been staying in, but rather this world, full of unicorns, fairies, and rainbows. But that's not all I see...

This is the object of my lust. I cannot help it! I see them in front of me as I type this entry. It disgusts me that I could ever be attracted to...this, but here they are, flexing their hard bodies in front of me. My desire, while no longer in my mind, has materialized. I am scared.

And finally, I can picture myself...myself many years one of my first Halloween costumes.

Oh cruel fate, why must you torture me with this love of brains? The thought of it now makes me nauseous, but I know once these drugs wear off, this boy will once again return to my personality, and my addiction to brains will continue.

I do not know which is worse...having to think these thoughts for all my life, or seeing them in front of me. Come to think of it, there was only one other time when I could see things this clearly, when I could see the folly of my ways. I can see her now. Her sillouhette in the gleam of light reflecting off the dancer's chest. That was the one time I was almost...normal.

But now, I know not where my fate takes me. Maybe, the drugging will continue, and I will be able to continue my observations. Or maybe, my visions themselves will drive me a new level of insanity, one that even I have never reached before. Or maybe, the drugging will cease, and my mind will become foggy again. I know not. All I hope for now is to be able to make another post on this blog, to not descend further into insanity, or even death.

Wish me luck,

Monday, January 22, 2007

after party!

omg! im so giddy! i just had the bestest time ever performing in my musical! evrything went so well and i even got to share a kiss w/ rufus! i think he liked it more than i did lol.

newayz, now mr glasses, haitian dude, rufus, and the rest of the cast is here at the Burnt Toast Diner. i tried to get mr glasses to bring his daughter, claire, but he wuldn't let her come, i wunder why lol.

i still cant use my mind trick for sum reason (i think its that haitian dude! why wont he talk, he almost ruined our scenes!), but its ok cuz i'm having a good time. they even had some munky brainz catered 4 me! lol. itz not human or doggie, but at least its sumthing.

this is a gr8 party, for realz. they got a karaoke machine here. rufus is singing unbreak my heart. omg itz a real pretty song, but i wunder about that man sumtimes. he seems if u know what i mean.

neways i tried to ask mr glasses to dance w/ me but he wuldnt. the nerve! i even had my boobies out 4 him! hes a cold man to turn that down.

newayz what am i doin typing on this, the party is still goin on! i'm sure i can get a dance with haitian. ttyl!

- Sylarz

Sunday, January 21, 2007

chattin with mr glasses

so u prolly already know that im being held captive by mr glasses, that big meanie. usually he asks me a lot of questions but today he seemed a little diff. like he wuznt as like, confident in himself or sumthing nemore. so i noticed this and started asking him questions and we like, totally bonded!

he told me that his daughter wuz making fun of his look. i put my own 2 cents in the matter, after all who better to give advice on the topic of looking fabulous than urs truly lol! he showed me his picture from his most recent makeover. i thought he looked like a total hunk!

neways he like totally broke down about me tryin to kill his daughter. he started cryin like a lil girl and slapped me! so i slapped him back! and then we both looked at each other and laughed. oh how silly we were!

neways i tried to get closer to him but he went back to his normal serious self. if he wuz gonna be a dork i was hopin i could at least be his gal pal! but i guess not.

but on the plus side, mr glasses wants 2 study me sum more so he said i could do whatever i wanted! and i chose to put on a musical. itz happening tonight! ill report on it tom at the Burnt Toast Diner. should be fun! thanx mr glasses!

oh and one more thing. i took this quiz bout how evil i wuz (i have a lot of free time on my hands lol).

You Are 98% Evil

You're the most evil person you know.
The devil is even a little scared of you!

lol *blushes*

Saturday, January 20, 2007

song stuck in my head!

so i dont have much to do in this lil room cept lust after mr glasses, plot my devious xcape, and post on blogs. but luckily i just d'loaded itunes so i kin listen to sum music now! neways ive been listening to this one song and now i cant get it out of my head. its a pretty great song! here well play a lil name that tune! can u name it? no googling you silly cheats!

Yeah..I like it when the girls stop the summer
Do you remember, do your remember, when we met that summer

New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick
And I think its fly when girls stop by for the summer, for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take her if I had one wish
But she's been gone since that summer...

Verse 1:
Hip Hop Marmalade Spic and Span
Met you one summer and it all began
You're the best girl that I ever did see
The great Larry Bird jersey 33
When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets
Call me Willy Whistle cuz I can't speak baby
Somethin in your eyes went and drove me crazy
Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad
Left one day and never came back
Stayed all summer the went back home
Macaulay Culkin was in Home Alone
Fell deep in love, but now we ain't speakin
Michael J. Fox was Alex P. Keaton
When I met you I said my name was Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch


Verse 2:
Cherry Pez, Cold Crush, Rock, Stud, Boogie
Used to hate school, so I had to play hookie
Always been hip to the b-boy style
Known to act wild and make a girl smile
Love New Edition and the Candy Girl
Reminds me of you because you rock my world
You come from Georgia where the peaches grow
They drink lemonade and speak real slow
You love Hip Hop and Rock &Roll
Dad took off when you where 4 years old
There was a good man named Paul Revere
I feel much better baby when you're near
You love Fun Dip and Cherry Coke
I like the way you laugh when I tell a joke
When I met you I said my name is Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch


Verse 3:
In the summertime girls got it goin on
Shake and wiggle to a Hip Hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike
Boogaloo Shrimp and Pogo sticks
My mind takes me back there, oh so quick
Let you off the hook like my man, Mr. Limpit
Think about that summer, and I bug cuz I miss it
Like the color Purple, Macaroni and cheese
Ruby red slippers, and a bunch of trees
Call you up but what's the use
I like Kevin Bacon, but i hate Foot Loose
Came in the door, I said it before
I think I'm over you, but I'm really not sure
When I met you I said my name is Rich
You look like a girl from Abercrombie and Fitch


Verse 4:
Summer girls come, and summer girls go
Some are worth while, and some are so so
Summer girls come, and summer girls go
Some are worth while, and some are so so
Summertime girls got it goin on
Shake and wiggle to a Hip Hop song
Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey, like I stole your bike

Saturday, January 6, 2007

The Breakfast of Champions!

Hi guys. I'm like, super bored. I just ate my breakfast, and now I have nothing to do! I'm not going shopping with my girlfriends til later, so I thought I would come on here and talk to all of you! Yay!
So I had to go out to eat, but I didn't have any food. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? So I saw this man walking his dog, and was like, time to try new things! So I chopped the little doggie's head off! OMG!!!! The man didn't like it, and he was kind of confused, I mean, since his doggie's head kind of just fell off (I used my special mind trick HIYA!), so I just chopped his head off too. Good thing I brought a little cooler to store some extra brain in. I had my lunch ready!
But I was set on trying new things for breakfast, so, like I took out the little doggie's brain, and ate it right there in the street! And OMG, it was like, SOOOO good. It was reallly small, but it was so tastey! Maybe next time I'll kill a bigger doggie. Or I could go to the zoo and try dolphin brain! They're supposed to be real smart, right? YEAH, they probably have real big, tastey brains! Maybe I can like, do that for dinner!
But, I'm getting ahead of myself. I gotta make sure I eat right. It's a good thing that doggie brain was so small, so I don't get all fat. I hope I don't get fat from all these brains. So maybe I'll skip lunch today, and eat the man's brain for dinner. I'll see what my girlfriends have to say!
Anyways, that's my post for the day! I'll be seeing you at the Burnt Toast Diner soon! Toodles!

Thursday, January 4, 2007

Out of the shadows and into the street!

Here I am world, my first blog! I know I've been busy repairing watches, murdering people and stealing super powers for the last year, but now sitting in this cell I have some time to talk to all my adoring fans (that Mr. Bennet is actually a very sweet man, giving me a laptop so I may post my insane babblings). Hopefully, I'll be able to munch on Hana's brain soon, then I won't even need a computer to do this! LOL!