Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Guest Poster: Future Sylar


Heys guys! Guess what? It's me, Future Sylar! I bet you're wondering how I got here to Present Sylar's blog, huh? Well it's simple, really! I beat Future Peter in our fight (he escaped though, poo nuggets!) and then went and ate Future Hiro's brain from his dead carcass and went back in time and now here I am!

I bet I know what else you're wondering...Yes I am coherent! But don't worry, I'm like...still myself lol! I've just been holding back a little to surprise you! BUT it's amazing what can become of me in five years, isn't it? I mean, five years in dark times will improve anyone's grammar, don't you think! That and in five years' time it has become like, totally uncool to type things with bad grammar, I'm so ashamed looking at this blog! That and like, I ate someone's brain with the power of good grammar. I guess that helped a little bit too, lol.

But you know what? It's like good that I can type and talk kinda normal now! I mean, if I couldn't, I wouldn't be able to be like Fake Future President Nathan. I mean, look at my totally awesome trickery!

"My fellow Americans. Today is the anniversary of a great tragedy in our history, one which will never be forgotten..."

OMG that is so funny! I don't even know how I do it without laughing! Retard bad grammar Sylar wouldn't be able to do it but I can get by, but just barely lol!

So what else is radical about my new grammar? Well, for one thing, slang from the '90s has become popular again lol! So, I can say that Orlando Bloom is totally da bomb, which I can say in this present time because he's dead in the future (Someone *cough cough* may have stolen his dope elven powers).

Anyways, I'm like hoping to meet up with my homes present Sylar. OMG, no, not to warn him, I like totally love the future! I'm the specialest homey around AND I am the leader of the free world! Present Sylar will be sooooo surprised to hear that! Anyways, the real reason I want to chill with him is because he's like totally the flyest cat around and to let him know that he is like following the right path to boys! Power equals boys, present Sylar, lol! Oh, and fix your grammar! It's like, totally unattractive or something lol.

368 comments:

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Mr. Bennet said...

I'd reply, but I get the feeling I'm dead in your future.

Svetlana Smith said...

Am I thin in your future? Do I still have my breastplate and cuisse bikini?

~ Lana

Nathan Petrelli said...

Since you haven't killed me yet, I will warn you that your past self lacks self-control. He may eat his own brain...Now that would be Drama

Sylar said...

Ha! You foolish imposter. You cannot lie too long. The true power will be unleashed. You must face my wrath dare you refuse to back down and show the world the true power of the true Sylar.

Edward Udora said...

Just make sure not to eat your past self's brain, it might cause the space-time continuum to implode... or something.

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