Help, Mohindy! Help! I know you're reading this and can use your Indian know how and maybe a rain dance or two to totally rain sexiness and girliness upon me! I've come to the like, climax of my story, and things couldn't be worse or some junk! First of all, I kissed a totally icky girl 'n prolly got some sort of disease! I mean, they tell you not to drink the water in Mexico, right? Well, Maya was like, in Mexico, and she had a whole mouthful of water! Slimey, saliva-y water! I'll get salmonella!
Then, on top of that, I killed a hot, beautiful man! I had to! Or did I? Maybe I just wanted him dead because I found him unsexy? Urkel knows I've killed many a women before for such a reason, lol! But how's a Sylar to know?! Unless Urkel himself drops down from cancelled TV show heaven and like, tells me himself! But I can't think for myself! Like, everyone knows I've gotten through life on my looks alone, lol! Oh, and my mind trick. And now I only have twice as much of one thing, and none of the other!
Not only was kissing like, totally hot, but I got all turned on 'n stuff at the thought of having a dead male body behind me! And I didn't even get to eat his brain :( I've become no better than that cur, Future Sylar! I had to get to Mohindy before him, or I'd like, be lost forever! Or at least until I went forward in time so much that I became Future Sylar or somethin, lol. But anyways, I need to get to Mohindy first so he can get my mind trick back! If I don't have it before I face Future Sylar, I could always resort to my trusty mug of doom, lol. But that shouldn't be a problem, I got to Mohindy's house first! I can totally outrun a teleport, lol.
But now, I'm left alone in Mohindy's house with the vixen, Maya. I'm like, thinking totally unnatural thoughts! I tried to think back to my Mohindy fantasy to ease my mind, but this is all I got...
Maya on a man body? And why was Matt there? That fatty wasn't even sexy when I WASN'T suffering from a nasty case of hetereosexuality sickness, lol. What did it all MEAN?
"I know what it means," said a figure, stepping out of the shadows. I recognized him, like, immediately!
"Future Sylar!" I accused! And my accusation was, like, totally correct. It WAS Future Sylar! "Can you like, read my mind or somethin'?" I asked him.
"I don't know, can I?"
I thought about unicorns. "Their horns sure are pretty," Future Sylar said!
"Amazing! Wait a minute! This post was supposed to end on a dramatic cliffhanger, you know, like of you revealing yourself, but we're still talking, and ruining the cliffhangerness!" I shrieked at Future Sylar.
"What? Oh, you're right. Sorry about that."